


"Similarities of a first and last meeting"

by DmnDgSys



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Minor Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:20:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27486421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DmnDgSys/pseuds/DmnDgSys
Summary: Floating in instrumentality, Kyoko Souryuu leaves her last thoughts to her daughter. A letter Asuka will never receive.
Kudos: 4





	"Similarities of a first and last meeting"

To my dearest Asuka,

When they first brought you into this world, there was silence. 

A brief one, believe me, and I’m sure if I ever told any of your friends that now, they’d laugh and think it was a joke. I remember as, even without your sight, you reached out, and grabbed hold of my finger, touching me and coming to me in your quest to find your mother's compassion for the very first time.

That, my dearest daughter, was the very first impression you ever made to me. 

A kind, quiet girl with ginger hair, reaching out for my hand, seeking the comfort of a mother.

It’s ironic, then, that only now, in this final meeting of ours, do you find me again; once more a quiet child with orange locks who wants nothing more than to be loved by her mother. 

I can’t explain to you the experiments at play that brought me within Unit-02, in no small part due to the fact that I have long since chosen to forget how foolish I was to leave my motherhood here, inside the eva unit. In that way, I suppose you can say we’re not too different from your friend Shinji, and his mother; or as you know her, Evangelion Unit-01. 

God we were such fools, Asuka.

To leave you, it will always be the greatest regret I will ever have. And today, that regret dies with me.

I’m sorry, Asuka. I’m still too selfish to die alone.

Instrumentality, brought upon the world by your friend, and clone of Yui, Rei Ayanami… These evangelions were made to bring the world together. To help forward the progress of instrumentality. I understand that now. But for  _ so long, _ my baby Asuka, that dragged us apart. 

Yui and I, in our own ways, are to blame for that. We worked our whole lives away, our minds and souls- quite literally- to this cause. And we lost the most important connections we had in an attempt to connect us all.

But now, as the AT fields around us all have disappeared, Lilith returning us to the primordial soup, I find that I am connected to you again. I am connected to  _ myself _ again. My mind is whole, and clear.

I have no body to return back to. I have no life I can return to if I choose to leave. But, my daughter, you’re strong. You’re so strong, and you have always had the will to live, even in your darkest moments.

I wanted you to know that. I always wanted you to know that.

I am proud of you, Asuka. 

My only regret is that you never got to hear those words from my own lips.

I will always love you.

Your mother,

Kyoko Zeppelin Soryuu

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This was a little fic written in a "who can write the best Evangelion one-shot angst" contest between me, Lunamme, and VoxelVirus! Their fics should be out shortly/now, depending on when you read this, so go check them out, and leave a comment to tell us who's you liked best! Thanks for reading!


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